For as far back as I can remember, back as far as 3 or 4 years of age, I was able to see the spiritual realm. As a child, I saw what I called “the invisible people.” At times, they would appear and tell me things about others. At other times, one would appear that I was afraid of. It was dark in color and larger than the rest. I called it “the shadow person.” It stood in the corner of my room and just stared at me. When I cried out for help, my family could not see it. As I grew older, the dark one stopped appearing. Medical experts diagnosed this to be a childhood imagination. The problem with their explanation is that this was not my imagination and I continued to see the invisible people, spirits, into adulthood. Most everyone whom I spoke to about this did not believe. So, I ceased talking about these things and kept most all of my experiences to myself.
My family was soon torn apart and I ran away. I became very bitter. I felt that nobody understood me. Nobody seemed to believe me and I was mad at the whole world. My heart became hard and I did whatever it took to get what I wanted. I hurt many people and I did not care.
My life was soon filled with earthly pleasures. Sex, drugs, alcohol, materials things. I was always seeking something to make me feel good. But none of these lasted. Deep inside, nothing had changed. My heart was still the same as before, hard and empty.
One day, I started seeking the paranormal and supernatural. When I found that others had similar experiences and also saw the spirits, I decided that I was going to use my gift to foretell the future. I called upon the spirits for answers. At times they appeared in form that others could relate to, usually someone who had passed on. I practiced tarot cards, numerology and sometimes astrology but calling the spirits and giving “psychic readings” was what I did. The books that I had read mentioned God and some even had prayers. These books spoke of doing “good” so it seemed right, for a while anyway.
One night, I lit candles and I began to call the spirits. Only this time, they did not appear to be loved ones who had passed on. They did not appear to be human at all and I began to feel very uncomfortable. Then, an entity appeared before me. An elongated, distorted, dark face was full of hate and was cursing. The thing told me that I had angered it and I was going to feel this anger. I became extremely frightened. Then my hand began to hurt. It felt like all of the moisture was leaving, like it was drying up. My hand was suddenly moistened. It burned.
After that, the spirits would appear only now I saw them as monstrous. I no longer had to call them. They appeared whenever they wanted to. When the demons came, they tormented me. Bad things began to happen in the earthly realm. I was robbed. I was beat up. I lost my home. I lost my car. I was arrested. I was in several accidents. I was raped. I was ill most all of the time. I was hospitalized. One of those times I had lost a lot of blood and I almost lost my life. Once, the demons entered my body and their noise overpowered me. I lay helpless trying to scream out. I felt as heavy as 3 or 4 large bodies were upon me. I could not speak nor move.
As the demons continued to torment me, I started to think about God. For the first time that I can remember, I was actually “praying.” I asked God to help me. But I had doubts. I remember praying “If there is a God” and “If you can hear me.” I doubted because of all the things I had done in my past. I just thought that if there was a God, I was so bad that God would reject me. But my life was falling fast and the demons were trying to kill me. I knew that no person would be able to help me. I thought that no one would believe me anyway. I had nothing else. God was my only hope.
One day, something inside of me told me to get out, to just leave. I was so convicted and believed that this was what I had to do. So, I packed what little I had left and I fled. It took all the money I had when I moved to the other side of the country and I never looked back at the huge mess I left behind.
Once I arrived at my new home, I had one solid month of rest. It was wonderful. But absolutely nothing can compare to what was about to come.
As I sat in my bedroom, a spirit appeared. I did not fear this time because he was different than those I had seen before. There was a calmness and peace about him. I knew that he would not hurt me. He looked like a man but I was in awe of his presence. I felt extremely small, like a child, and even though he appeared like a man, his presence overtook the entire room. He had white hair and a white beard. He wore a long white robe with a gold sash around him. His hands were hidden in the sleeves of his robe. I could not see his eyes; I could only see his lips. He was only there for a moment but shared what seemed to be hours of time with me. He spoke but his lips never moved. Then, I began to see visions. I saw a great war. I saw evil forces and wickedness. I saw a multitude of sin and each appeared like a demon. I saw an angel of light but it deceives the world because it is really Satan the devil, the evil one. I saw that it came here to the earth and it lies to us all. I then heard the words “It is forbidden. Do not do it again.” And I knew I was forbidden of sorcery, of witchcraft. I knew that I had been delivered from the grips of hell.
The very next afternoon there was a knock at my front door. A visitor came and he had a Holy Bible with him, a book I had not read. I immediately shared about the man who appeared that I met the day before. I told him that I believe he was sent from God. He said, “He was sent from God and came to this world in the flesh.” He then took me to the scripture and asked me to read aloud:
- Revelation 1:13 and among the lampstands was someone like a son of man, dressed in a robe reaching down to his feet and with a golden sash around his chest. 14 His head and hair were white like wool, as white as snow -
That was as far as I got when my mouth dropped open. I looked up at my visitor and he said,
I was so filled with such overwhelming joy and to this day, He has never left me. The Lord Jesus Christ, My Savior is The One True Living God.
The Lord gave me a new heart. I now live a blessed life. And because of God's merciful grace, I have been given the promise of eternal life even though I do not deserve it. For this, I am forever grateful.
John 3:15 - and everyone who looks up to Him, trusting and expectant, will gain a real life, eternal life.
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